handsome: did you think that was awkward?
me: yes, that was awkward.
have you ever found yourself at a party,
where you were the only non-married, non-child-rearing person there?
it’s not weird, is it?
no- it is fun!
now, imagine the party is a meet and greet
for your friend’s newborn baby.
and you’re there with your main squeeze.
and the two of you are the only non-married people.
and still, the only other non-parents
are completely outnumbered by parents.
it's not that i don't care about pumping v. formula
or about bowel movements
or daycare wait lists
maybe someday i will care very much...
i care when people talk to me and handsome like
marriage and children
is a done deal.
a foregone conclusion.
something that i need to write down now
because time's a-wasting and
my uterus isn't getting any younger.
because i am aware of my age.
but i'm also aware that our friends love us,
and love us together
that they can't imagine handsome and i
not having the type of life they do.
but we're not married.
we only talk about marriage in abstracts
and i like it that way…
because for the first time in the history of miss priss dating,
i am not only spectacularly happy with someone,
but i’m really enjoying the journey.
now, don't get me wrong-
if handsome and i keep going on this track o’ bliss
i couldn’t imagine not making it permanent.
actually, i couldn’t imagine not making it permanent now, but for later
does that even make sense?
i love my friends for seeing us as the real thing
i love feeling like we’re the real thing
but it would be nice to have more time to get there...
so for now, i think handsome and i are going to have to deal
with the awkward conversations
and if we are very
maybe in a handful of years
we can make non-married couples just as uncomfortable with our married talk
somewhere down the road
when we're finished dating
in the future.